


What's the matter? I thought you wanted it

by Cuillere



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dubious Consent, F/M, LFF Comment Project, Not A Happy Ending, maybe sort of rape, writing challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 15:05:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13706934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cuillere/pseuds/Cuillere
Summary: Stiles and Nessie are Soulmates. They finally decide to take their relationship one step further. But not everything happens as it was supposed to...





	What's the matter? I thought you wanted it

They were awkward and clumsy. They had always sort of been awkward and it was probable they’d always be. But it was actually the first time they were clumsy around each other. They had kissed and touched each other countless times, so maybe it was them undressing each other that made them clumsy. Or maybe they were both so feverish. That was hard to tell. But for some reason, it unnerved Stiles.  
  
_We discussed this. She knows what she’s doing. She doesn’t feel like she has to do this because she’s my Soulmate. We’ve discussed this through already. And she took the time she needed, right? She wouldn’t have felt compelled by the fact that I was ready, right? I mean, I’m still older than her so it’s completely normal that I feel ready first. Yes. And she knows it. We discussed this._  
  
Nessie stopped moving for a second.  
“Stiles, is everything alright? I can see the wheels turning in your head.” She had an interrogatory smile on her soft lips.  
  
“Yes. Yes, sorry. I’m just a bit stressed out. I want to know you’re sure you want to do this.”  
  
Contrarily to what Stiles had expected, she didn’t scold him for asking again, and he was grateful.  
  
“I’m sure. I’m ready Stiles.” Her gaze was intense and it seemed like she was trying to make him feel how true this was and how sure she was. As an afterthought, she added: “Are you ready for this? We have plenty of time, you know?”  
  
He paused for a second, staring at her, before he answered “I’m ready” and resumed kissing her.  
  
They bumped clumsily into each other a few additional times before it felt like they had found a rhythm. Their new-found equilibrium had helped Stiles getting rid of the rest of his questioning thoughts and anxiety when he felt a cold thing pulling down his back. He paused for an instant and pinched his eyes to get rid of the disagreeable feeling. Nessie slowed down too and simply stroke his back, waiting for him to come back into the moment.  
  
The feeling receded but didn't totally disappear. It was still enough for Stiles to ignore it and give Nessie a deep kiss; now completely concentrated on her reactions, on what they were doing.  
  
Now that they were in their underwear, their skin rarely disconnected, whether it was them kissing or their hands on one another. Her hands kept coming back to his hair, shuffling and gripping at times. And Stiles loved it. Each time she gripped, his breathing stopped for an instant, his eyes closing.  
  
Stiles was particularly fond of her shoulders and he often kissed her there. It made her gasp in the most delicious way he had experienced so far.  
  
He was grazing his teeth softly against her skin when he felt the pull again. It was diffused along his spine, not quite painful but shrouding his mind. It felt cold, too. He closed his eyes again, for just an instant, to clear his vision. But the pull intensified and Stiles felt for an instant like he was being pulled out of his body. Panic started creeping up his ribcage.  
  
When he opened his eyes, he found that there was nothing to see.  
  
His throat tightened some more and he felt like he was gasping for air.  
  
_What? What the hell is wrong with me?_ I am _sick? Did I not open my eyes? Did I just pass out? Why can’t I see anything? Where is Nessie?_  
  
Questions turmoiled as he started to feel light headed but the thought of Nessie somehow let him distinguish her. He could not exactly see her but he had a sense of what was happening, _like a vision._  
  
She was still with him. He was biting harder than intended in her neck.  
  
The confusion this provoked was luckily enough to stop the panic attack and Stiles found himself panting, cheeks wet and hands on his knees, trying to understand what was happening.  
  
He clearly didn’t have any control over what he was doing. Because it could only be him in the vision. He could see his own hands roaming her body and he could even feel the contact of her skin on his. Her ribs, her waist.  
  
“Careful,” she hissed, ”you’re hurting me.”  
  
_His_ hands were pressed harshly into her back. He could feel her flesh around them.  
  
Stiles' thoughts were running, trying to make sense of this. His first thoughts had been that it wasn't real, that he was dreaming. But he knew this was happening. _He_ was inflicting her pain.  
  
Stiles felt sick, a nauseous warmth gnawing at his insides.  
Something was controlling him, and hurting her.  
  
“Oh,” his voice sounded strange, yet familiar in the vision. He didn’t even sound surprised. “Yes”.  
  
Stiles felt the burning hot rage surge through his body. The thing was hurting Nessie on purpose.  
  
“That’s part of the game.”  
  
Another wave of rage came through him, mixed with a wish to comfort her, but he painfully realized how helpless he was: he could not make it stop, he could not take Nessie away. He could not call Scott, either. He couldn’t do anything. He was stuck inside his body, helpless.  
  
He could see she was not comfortable. His grip lessened a bit.  
  
“I’ll be more careful, but you excite me.”  
  
He was biting his lips, making it sound like a confession, but Stiles knew this was a lie. He would be very careful to have her think it was not intended, yes, but he was definitely going to hurt her again. The feeling was just entirely too agreeable. Even though the self-disgust accompanied it. He couldn’t help the peak of excitement he felt at her nod, barely knowing if it was really his or not.  
  
“It’s fine.”  
  
_No, no it’s not fine, Nessie! Don’t let me hurt you!_  
  
A deep laugh echoed in the dark and Stiles opened his eyes, looking for the source of the awful sound. It was coming from everywhere. It was inside his skull. He knew it came from the thing that possessed him.  
  
“Yes, she will, Stiles. That’s the beauty of it all. She is going to let you hurt her. Every time she’ll have a doubt, she’ll think she should be more careful. She’ll believe something’s wrong with her long before she’ll doubt you, Stiles. You’re her Soulmate, after all.”  
  
Stiles’s face and chest were burning with rage. But, as he was painfully aware, there was nothing he could do. Nothing but talk to it. Maybe he could distract the thing from Nessie. And if he could distract himself from the vision, he was definitely going to try.  
  
“What do you want?”  
“Let’s play a game, Stiles, shall we? When you can answer one riddle, I’ll answer one of your questions.”  
  
Stiles certainly hadn’t expected that.  
  
“To prove my good faith, I’ll answer that first one for free: Chaos, Strife and Pain.”  
  
It quickly became apparent that there was no distracting the thing - a Nogitsune, Stiles now knew -  and Stiles’s hopes kept decreasing. He was just incapable of doing anything for Nessie. The only thing he could do was to wish - pray - that she would be strong. That she would realize something was wrong with him and that nothing was wrong with her. That she was being played and manipulated by him. Hopefully, she would realize that him being her Soulmate didn’t mean she had to stick with him, no matter what.  
  
_We discussed this. She knows that me being her Soulmate doesn’t mean she has to do anything. She doesn’t need to put up with this crap, she knows it._  
  
“But does she, Stiles? She had time to think about it. And she chose you. She’s giving herself to you. She’s not going to change her mind now, is she?”  
  
Stiles violently put his hands over his ears, but there was nothing that could stop either the sound of its voice, or the vision. She _was_ giving herself, entirely, despite the fact that she did not enjoy it as much as she should have. Despite the doubt he could read on her face, when she thought he wasn’t looking. Each time he caught those looks, he could feel his own excitement grow, and his self-disgust at the same time.  
  
When she started moaning, Stiles started sobbing. It was right. The Nogitsune was right. Now that she had made her decision, she was going to go through with it and give her best to make it work. And the Nogitsune was going to keep abusing her. _He_ was going to keep abusing her.  
  
“What’s the matter? I thought you wanted it?”  
  
The voice rang in his head again. Of course, it knew that’s not what he wanted, not like that. He’d give anything now to not have her.  
  
He was a failure. A failure with a broken heart.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for @All-alone-he-turns-to-stone on tumblr! the original post is [here.](http://cuillere.tumblr.com/post/170955465899/whats-the-matter-i-thought-you-wanted-it)
> 
> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:  
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